Listening to: Landon Pigg.
Avoiding: nothing really
I have one request.
people should stop talking about me like they know my life and everything about me. because you don't know me.
you didn't even try.
so stop.
Sunday, February 6, 2011
Sunday, January 2, 2011
off we go.
Location: Office
Listening to: Matt & Kim
Avoiding: Sleep. mostly. I want today to just keep going.
Here we are, 2011. Who would have thought it would ever come? I remember being in like second grade and everything had our graduation year on it, and we thought it was FOREVER away. Well look where we've crash landed. What a whirl wind it's been.
They say these are the years we'll remember the most. That they're "days of our lives". Frankly, I think that it's just beginning. Because if High School is the best it gets for you in life... well you just don't know how to live. But there is no doubt that all the crazy stuff I've done will live in my memories for a long time. Those moments when you were just purely happy. When you did something completely crazy and slightly irrational. Vignettes that just shine so bright in your mind you can't help but smile. You look back, you laugh, you cry, then you laugh some more.
It's weird to think that I'll be leaving in a mere six months. I think this fact alone is allowing me to just go for it. Not that I didn't already, but it's a whole new sense of freedom that I can almost taste. I just could care less about many silly things. And I am glad. It's also weird to think that I'll be leaving the one place I have known my ENTIRE life. A dazzling 17.6 years so far. I love it, but I'm ready to go. To everything there is a time and a season, and my time here. It's almost up. I'm excited but nervous to forge on with the future. I'll be ready when I get there.
So here's to 2010. It taught me loads. I've grown so much as a person. Honestly, from where I was a year ago it's almost a parallel universe. Crazy how much can change in so little time, such a strange illusion. A year ago I was with all my friends (now in college.. :( ) and having a girls night, because we were all so fed up. I wouldn't have even thought of hanging out with half the people I have in these last few weeks a year ago. I was caught up in silly things. I made starting Varsity and learned so much as a lacrosse player. I let go of people, I met some new ones. I did some straight up crazy stuff. I repelled off roofs. Went exploring. Simply, I just tried to live the only way I know how; love all those around you, no matter what. It's how I live. It's what I strive for. I only want to continue learning, loving, and living --I will, no one's stopping me.
I'm looking forward to what this year will teach me. Who I will meet. It's off to a good start. Today was awesome :) I'm just happy. I have been blessed with good friends. So 2011, bring it on. I'm ready.
Sunday, December 12, 2010
Life In Technicolor
Location: Mahhh roomm
Listening to: Sway -oh jazz music, the things you do to me
Avoiding: Just taking a break from calculus.
Life's a little crazy. A little fun. And can be a little awkward. Embrace those moments, laugh at them it's so much fun. I'm doing my own thing. I've never felt better. Loving my life. I wouldn't have it any other way. Nope, never.
This weekend has been spectacular. The passer by might think I'm a little silly for saying so, I didn't do anything extravagant. I just laughed till it hurt. Made some new friends, and I couldn't stop smiling. This weekend was an answer to prayers, the Lord is awesome like that. I'm glad he can make things happen in the way we need them too. It's amazing how he can let a couple people just come into your life and totally re-open your eyes. Ah, the tender mercies they're just grand.
Listen to Life In Technicolor by Coldplay. It's my theme song. Goes exactly with how I'm feeling. Love. Love. Love. Love it.
I'm just happy. So elated. Pure bliss :)
Listening to: Sway -oh jazz music, the things you do to me
Avoiding: Just taking a break from calculus.
Life's a little crazy. A little fun. And can be a little awkward. Embrace those moments, laugh at them it's so much fun. I'm doing my own thing. I've never felt better. Loving my life. I wouldn't have it any other way. Nope, never.
This weekend has been spectacular. The passer by might think I'm a little silly for saying so, I didn't do anything extravagant. I just laughed till it hurt. Made some new friends, and I couldn't stop smiling. This weekend was an answer to prayers, the Lord is awesome like that. I'm glad he can make things happen in the way we need them too. It's amazing how he can let a couple people just come into your life and totally re-open your eyes. Ah, the tender mercies they're just grand.
Listen to Life In Technicolor by Coldplay. It's my theme song. Goes exactly with how I'm feeling. Love. Love. Love. Love it.
I'm just happy. So elated. Pure bliss :)
So glad It's finally snowing! well... sorta. but still :) :) Best Friday in a while. Thanks for the ice cream and laughs ;)
Tuesday, December 7, 2010
Fundemental lessons
Location: Floor
Listening to: Music I love
Avoiding: Physics.lit.hw
I am me.
It's a simple statement, but I couldn't be happier any other way. I may be rather unconventional at times it makes me happy to be just that. That being said, I like to make people wonder. Many find me peculiar, but I don't think that's a bad thing. See, dear reader, I know what I know to be right, and I stand for that. I am what almost every other teens worst fear is. Myself. I it was Marinnane Williamson who so eloquently said;
"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others."
I especially like that last line. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others. I've recently been sown by several different people the power I have with in myself to change lives. I hold these people near and dear to my heart. But really, Who are we NOT to be??? We all have so much potential so why not actualize it? Who cares if you've never played a new sport, why not try it? Who cares if a subject you love in school is considered nerdy? In fact, who cares who did what with who this weekend? NO ONE! Which is fantastic, because the only person that really does care is yourself - and if everyone is busy thinking about themselves well... i say put that aside for a few moments. Open your eyes to those around you. Give people compliments. Smile. Be Confident. Be you. and have no fear. Because strange as it seems, that confidence can be ground breaking. If you are yourself, people will want to be with you. Soon, you'll be talking to people you never even knew, helping others be confident in themselves also. People generally notice one of two things. Confidence or Arrogance; the two are often placed in the same category but are extremely different. One cannot exist with the other. Plain as light and dark. So let it be confidence. Surround yourself with people who build each other up. Don't let them drag you down, (although it will happen) continue to exhibit kindness and love - help them be confident.
If there's anything I've learned these past few years of high school it's that you can be the most confident person in the world, but there's always room to grow. You're going to feel under appreciated, but you won't remember those moments - all you'll remember is the days you had a smile on your face... so why not make them all that way? You're going to remember how it felt when he grabbed your hand in the hallway the first time, how embarrassed you felt when your silly video was played infront of the whole school. How content you felt at the end of Prom, that it all went smoothly. How nervous you were for your many firsts - first class, first date, first kiss, first game. How it was to be the new kid. How some days were just completely spontaneous. How one person of thing could make you smile for weeks on end. It's amazing. Enjoy it. It goes by way to fast, and it's a wild ride. Seek the adventure in everyday. Love who you are. You'll go far in this world.
I hope people will think of me, and a smile will come to their face.
TV Live :)
Sometimes we just need to laugh at ourselves, and when we spill our salad all over the floor while telling crazy stories.
Listening to: Music I love
Avoiding: Physics.lit.hw
I am me.
It's a simple statement, but I couldn't be happier any other way. I may be rather unconventional at times it makes me happy to be just that. That being said, I like to make people wonder. Many find me peculiar, but I don't think that's a bad thing. See, dear reader, I know what I know to be right, and I stand for that. I am what almost every other teens worst fear is. Myself. I it was Marinnane Williamson who so eloquently said;
"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others."
I especially like that last line. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others. I've recently been sown by several different people the power I have with in myself to change lives. I hold these people near and dear to my heart. But really, Who are we NOT to be??? We all have so much potential so why not actualize it? Who cares if you've never played a new sport, why not try it? Who cares if a subject you love in school is considered nerdy? In fact, who cares who did what with who this weekend? NO ONE! Which is fantastic, because the only person that really does care is yourself - and if everyone is busy thinking about themselves well... i say put that aside for a few moments. Open your eyes to those around you. Give people compliments. Smile. Be Confident. Be you. and have no fear. Because strange as it seems, that confidence can be ground breaking. If you are yourself, people will want to be with you. Soon, you'll be talking to people you never even knew, helping others be confident in themselves also. People generally notice one of two things. Confidence or Arrogance; the two are often placed in the same category but are extremely different. One cannot exist with the other. Plain as light and dark. So let it be confidence. Surround yourself with people who build each other up. Don't let them drag you down, (although it will happen) continue to exhibit kindness and love - help them be confident.
If there's anything I've learned these past few years of high school it's that you can be the most confident person in the world, but there's always room to grow. You're going to feel under appreciated, but you won't remember those moments - all you'll remember is the days you had a smile on your face... so why not make them all that way? You're going to remember how it felt when he grabbed your hand in the hallway the first time, how embarrassed you felt when your silly video was played infront of the whole school. How content you felt at the end of Prom, that it all went smoothly. How nervous you were for your many firsts - first class, first date, first kiss, first game. How it was to be the new kid. How some days were just completely spontaneous. How one person of thing could make you smile for weeks on end. It's amazing. Enjoy it. It goes by way to fast, and it's a wild ride. Seek the adventure in everyday. Love who you are. You'll go far in this world.
I hope people will think of me, and a smile will come to their face.
TV Live :)
Spectacular day of shenanigans in the park!
Sometimes we just need to laugh at ourselves, and when we spill our salad all over the floor while telling crazy stories.
Tuesday, November 30, 2010
Functions
Location: fluffy
Listening to: my heart.
Avoiding: one word. Roger.
I wish I had a more eloquent way with words.
Sometimes, I feel completely out of place. Like everyday. OR how I should be working on other things right now. But I just can't seem to focus. My mind keeps wandering to the things I've written about in the past few days that I should post.
Or I could be doing something that will actually get me somewhere in this life.
Listening to: my heart.
Avoiding: one word. Roger.
I wish I had a more eloquent way with words.
Sometimes, I feel completely out of place. Like everyday. OR how I should be working on other things right now. But I just can't seem to focus. My mind keeps wandering to the things I've written about in the past few days that I should post.
Or I could be doing something that will actually get me somewhere in this life.
Friday, November 19, 2010
Science of Fear
Location: Atop a most comfortable mattress
Listening to: Temper Trap.
Avoiding: a lot.
I feel like I should have something to say. It's not a conceivable feeling. There is no onomatopoeia that I could write down that, you, the reader could understand.
It's been a year. In other cases a month. Much has changed. Much has happened.
I've been thinking about my passions. And how incredibly hard it is to put yourself down on paper in less than 500 words to be judged and scrutinized by people who are all about 50 years old. I'm just praying whatever the faculty at the high school sees in me is translated to the paper. I'm just being myself. I figure that's my best shot.
It's like they expect me to have my whole life figured out right now. There's no way. I have a mere 17 years of experience on this earth. If you could even call it that. I'm undeniably scared. But also excited at the thought of taking on the world. It's stressful. An adventure is waiting just around the corner. I don't know how anything is going to work. For now I just keep praying for guidance to make the correct decisions, and to be where I'm needed. I trust the Lord will provide. He does cool stuff like that :)
I have dreams. I will make them a reality.
I need to let people know I'm thankful more often. So let's begin here. I am thankful for you, dear reader. For taking a moment to see how I'm thinking. And for quietly understanding. It's appreciated.
and please.
Love me without fear. Trust me without wondering. love me without restrictions. want me without demand. accept me the way i am.
and you.
you make the world beautiful just by living in it.
remember.
Smile.
Listening to: Temper Trap.
Avoiding: a lot.
I feel like I should have something to say. It's not a conceivable feeling. There is no onomatopoeia that I could write down that, you, the reader could understand.
It's been a year. In other cases a month. Much has changed. Much has happened.
I've been thinking about my passions. And how incredibly hard it is to put yourself down on paper in less than 500 words to be judged and scrutinized by people who are all about 50 years old. I'm just praying whatever the faculty at the high school sees in me is translated to the paper. I'm just being myself. I figure that's my best shot.
It's like they expect me to have my whole life figured out right now. There's no way. I have a mere 17 years of experience on this earth. If you could even call it that. I'm undeniably scared. But also excited at the thought of taking on the world. It's stressful. An adventure is waiting just around the corner. I don't know how anything is going to work. For now I just keep praying for guidance to make the correct decisions, and to be where I'm needed. I trust the Lord will provide. He does cool stuff like that :)
I have dreams. I will make them a reality.
I need to let people know I'm thankful more often. So let's begin here. I am thankful for you, dear reader. For taking a moment to see how I'm thinking. And for quietly understanding. It's appreciated.
and please.
Love me without fear. Trust me without wondering. love me without restrictions. want me without demand. accept me the way i am.
and you.
you make the world beautiful just by living in it.
remember.
Smile.
Monday, November 8, 2010
Just know.
Location: Office
Listening to: Silence
Avoiding: . . . .
I am.
a horrible person.
please understand. I'm tryin'
but there's only so much I can do.
Please. Just take a moment to look and see.
My intentions are good. I love who you are. How bright your colors shine.
Know that I see it in you.
You have more potential then you'll ever know.
I am thankful for you.
I'm sorry if I don't always show it.
Love and friendship are verbs.
I'll try harder.
I promise.
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