Saturday, July 25, 2009
Sunday, July 12, 2009
Learn from the moments...
The past few days have let me...how you say. think.
I had the chance to go up to Flaming Gorge with some friends to just boat and mess around. Forget the world for a few days. I turned off my phone as soon as we started driving, and then didn't turn it on untill about an hour before we got back to P.C. The fact that I just didn't have to worry about any drama happening back home was AMAZING. I loved it. All I had to worry about was what I was doing, and having a good time. And I did. I learned how to wakeboard, jumped off some cliffs, laughed my butt off, and you know what. while I was there. Everything seemed like it was going to be okay. Because I forgot.
None the less I also learned a few things too.
-Nature is the best place for thinking. I especially like the calm rocking of the water in a kyack. One of the most soothing things I have ever done is just sit and float ontop of the water. Just let my mind wander... and even though I'm not sure how, [through my tangled ramblings some call thoughts] I came to a few conclusions. And that was an adventure all on it's own.
-Wakeboaring has it's lessons too. You have to have endurance, paticence, an ability to laugh at yourself and you have to keep your board up out of the water ;) but, that is rather like life. Once I got it though it was one of the best feelings in the world, I had so much control, yet, so much freedom. Everysecond flying across that water was an amazing feeling. And learing everything, it was just like trying to get the hang of life, even when you get it... it's not going to be perfect but those moments where we do something brilliant are the most epic and make you keep going. It was true bliss.
-We need to face our fears... even if it feels like you wont come out alive. Most likley you will. We went cliff jumping. There was about a range of about 10 feet high to 45 feet. Many were working their way up getting higher each time. That is what I did, but man, when I got to that 45 foot high cliff. I freaked. Still I was watching kid after kid go off just fine. When it was my turn I just stood there, I knew the water was safe... plenty deep the cliff went out far enough that you would have no chance of hitting anything on your way down execpt water. My mind toyed with the idea for a few minutes then finally I turned around and walked back a few steps, then I just walked off that cliff. One of the scariest but most exciting things I have ever done. Absolutley amazing. and you know what? It taught me something, sometimes we just need to face our problems head on, just go for it, and trust that we will be okay. And then just LIVE.
There have been lots of experiences in 16 years (and i'm excited for more), but ultimately, at the end of the day, that's what makes you who you are. We all know how to laugh, we all know how to cry, and we all know how to love back. We all know heartbreak, but the world keeps moving, and we keep moving along with it. And everything we experience helps us realize how beautiful life really is.
I had the chance to go up to Flaming Gorge with some friends to just boat and mess around. Forget the world for a few days. I turned off my phone as soon as we started driving, and then didn't turn it on untill about an hour before we got back to P.C. The fact that I just didn't have to worry about any drama happening back home was AMAZING. I loved it. All I had to worry about was what I was doing, and having a good time. And I did. I learned how to wakeboard, jumped off some cliffs, laughed my butt off, and you know what. while I was there. Everything seemed like it was going to be okay. Because I forgot.
None the less I also learned a few things too.
-Nature is the best place for thinking. I especially like the calm rocking of the water in a kyack. One of the most soothing things I have ever done is just sit and float ontop of the water. Just let my mind wander... and even though I'm not sure how, [through my tangled ramblings some call thoughts] I came to a few conclusions. And that was an adventure all on it's own.
-Wakeboaring has it's lessons too. You have to have endurance, paticence, an ability to laugh at yourself and you have to keep your board up out of the water ;) but, that is rather like life. Once I got it though it was one of the best feelings in the world, I had so much control, yet, so much freedom. Everysecond flying across that water was an amazing feeling. And learing everything, it was just like trying to get the hang of life, even when you get it... it's not going to be perfect but those moments where we do something brilliant are the most epic and make you keep going. It was true bliss.
-We need to face our fears... even if it feels like you wont come out alive. Most likley you will. We went cliff jumping. There was about a range of about 10 feet high to 45 feet. Many were working their way up getting higher each time. That is what I did, but man, when I got to that 45 foot high cliff. I freaked. Still I was watching kid after kid go off just fine. When it was my turn I just stood there, I knew the water was safe... plenty deep the cliff went out far enough that you would have no chance of hitting anything on your way down execpt water. My mind toyed with the idea for a few minutes then finally I turned around and walked back a few steps, then I just walked off that cliff. One of the scariest but most exciting things I have ever done. Absolutley amazing. and you know what? It taught me something, sometimes we just need to face our problems head on, just go for it, and trust that we will be okay. And then just LIVE.
There have been lots of experiences in 16 years (and i'm excited for more), but ultimately, at the end of the day, that's what makes you who you are. We all know how to laugh, we all know how to cry, and we all know how to love back. We all know heartbreak, but the world keeps moving, and we keep moving along with it. And everything we experience helps us realize how beautiful life really is.
Thursday, July 2, 2009
Brilliance
This just makes me very happy. I love it. Pretty much the best.
Plus it includes some of my loves. Piano. Coldplay. Taylor Swift... but mostly the Piano and Coldplay :)
Plus it includes some of my loves. Piano. Coldplay. Taylor Swift... but mostly the Piano and Coldplay :)
Wednesday, July 1, 2009
Dream...
I tend to cover things up with my independent, sassy, loud, outspoken self.
Somtimes this can backfire.
Here I am. High School Junior. Things are looking good. Going to be the student body president, I have a house, live in a BEAUTIFUL town, and am very blessed by the people I know. Still alot of people never get to see beneath the home.
under the roof.
where wounds can happen.
Now don't get me wrong, I love my family... we're disfunctional like any other family. But sometimes it's not always the best.
Things change. Stuck in the middle is what I am. Not quite old enough to be with the college siblings, but not young enough to be with the little ones. So I'm trying to assert some sort of independence. I'm not sure how to do this exactly. I'm trying to figure it out.
There are dreams I have that my parents don't nessicarialy agree with. I want to go in to psycology. They want me to do something with my math skills and smarts... but wouldn't it be better to do something that I LOVE rather than doing it for the money??? I think so, I could live in a cardboard box for all I care AND STILL BE HAPPY. Because I want to do something I have DREAMED about doing. A PASSION. Something that I'm good at. Where I can assert my indepence and do things how I want. Experement with ne methods. Learn... Just like I am now.
A girl can dream right?
Because what's the point if we don't?
Somtimes this can backfire.
Here I am. High School Junior. Things are looking good. Going to be the student body president, I have a house, live in a BEAUTIFUL town, and am very blessed by the people I know. Still alot of people never get to see beneath the home.
under the roof.
where wounds can happen.
Now don't get me wrong, I love my family... we're disfunctional like any other family. But sometimes it's not always the best.
Things change. Stuck in the middle is what I am. Not quite old enough to be with the college siblings, but not young enough to be with the little ones. So I'm trying to assert some sort of independence. I'm not sure how to do this exactly. I'm trying to figure it out.
There are dreams I have that my parents don't nessicarialy agree with. I want to go in to psycology. They want me to do something with my math skills and smarts... but wouldn't it be better to do something that I LOVE rather than doing it for the money??? I think so, I could live in a cardboard box for all I care AND STILL BE HAPPY. Because I want to do something I have DREAMED about doing. A PASSION. Something that I'm good at. Where I can assert my indepence and do things how I want. Experement with ne methods. Learn... Just like I am now.
A girl can dream right?
Because what's the point if we don't?
Wednesday, June 24, 2009
Remember
RIP Chris Yeates. We love you. It's been a year. Never forgotten. 6/30/08
[change is coming. things are different. life is random] typical.
yet, I love every moment. Painful or painless. It's the steps we take to get where we are going...love those the most.
Especially the leaps.
[change is coming. things are different. life is random] typical.
yet, I love every moment. Painful or painless. It's the steps we take to get where we are going...love those the most.
Especially the leaps.
Tuesday, June 16, 2009
Quickly
Today was a crazy day... you know those days that are like what-the-devil-just-happened-slash-whats-going-on kind of day. yet. amidst all the confusion and fun of the day there are still things that make me smile and I'm glad for that.
One example is the sheer joy of running. I run. Alot. And quite frankly it's a good way to think, and a good way just to have fun. A way to challenge your self. I like it, quite a bit. Plus, it's good for you :) aside from the point it was raining when I ran, which made it all of that much better. But quite honestly it can't last forever, and that is the same with people, I know nothing can last forever, but maybe a little more time would be nice. Granted, thoughts can hurt at times. Yet, I know I will get over everything... sooner or later. For now I can just keep on running, and remember the things that make me smile.
One example is the sheer joy of running. I run. Alot. And quite frankly it's a good way to think, and a good way just to have fun. A way to challenge your self. I like it, quite a bit. Plus, it's good for you :) aside from the point it was raining when I ran, which made it all of that much better. But quite honestly it can't last forever, and that is the same with people, I know nothing can last forever, but maybe a little more time would be nice. Granted, thoughts can hurt at times. Yet, I know I will get over everything... sooner or later. For now I can just keep on running, and remember the things that make me smile.
Monday, June 15, 2009
Begining
It's finally summer! I'm kind of a dork, becuase I really like going to school... but I'm glad it's over becuse I'm ready for a break from all the work! It's kinda wild sometimes, and I love it, but I don't think I will miss it... atleast not too much;)
So, some more people have come into my life that I will be eternally grateful for. Alissa Smith is one of them. She is like a grown up me... at least that is what I would like to think I will be like, seriously I love her. Anyways, so she always says that we are more alike than different. And I believe her. We had a converstation last night that ensued to help us discover somethings about ourselves and also led to a most EPIC email. And by the end of it all, I almost forgot why I was so upset... and really that was great. I cried a little too. but it was good and much needed. As confusing as life is... it's also so very beautiful. And even though life may not always be the easiest option... it is the best one. I have a passion [or atleast I hope I do] for life. And I love living and sharing it with someother people. Now all I need is someone to share it with.
Now there are a few things I have decided we need to do in life.
FIRST. Find our own rythm. We all have something in us that tells us the beat of our lives, and it directs us, tells us where to go so we can be in the right places at the right times. Call it what you like.. but I call it the spirit. And that can be the key to a successful life and being influenceal on others.
SECOND. Learn that you are never alone. Ever. no matter what. Odds are there is going to be someone who has gone through or is going through whatever you are. and so with this epifany. Even though you may be asked to stand alone... it's all for the betterment of you and what you stand for. people respect you for it. and that is a fact I am truly grateful for.
THRID. Treat everyone with love and kindness as you pass. You may not know, they could be having the worst day of their lives and have plans to go home and kill themselves that night, but then they don't because someone like you or me reaches out with a smile or a simple, hello. Believe me, simple things can change lives, I have exprienced this first hand. And it's truly amazing... Also please don't go around assuming people who have a not broken and divorced "typical american" family are not as broken and as hurting as you are on the inside. Sometimes becuse they have the family "Mom, Dad, Brother, Sister" under one roof they have someof the BIGGEST problems. But yet they cover it up, very, very, very, well... and they would gladly trade problems with you like...what, are you too popular? guys try to take advantatge of you? you don't have enough money? Gladly they would want to trade problems with you. Because just like me... the always happy one.. I have problems.. I will admit it. and they hurt alot. they have caused me more pain than you would want to know. so just be nice. enough said.
and last. be a listener. it helps so much. and mabye you can give good advice too. bbut thats up to you and how inspired you are feeling... hopefully its such.
So, some more people have come into my life that I will be eternally grateful for. Alissa Smith is one of them. She is like a grown up me... at least that is what I would like to think I will be like, seriously I love her. Anyways, so she always says that we are more alike than different. And I believe her. We had a converstation last night that ensued to help us discover somethings about ourselves and also led to a most EPIC email. And by the end of it all, I almost forgot why I was so upset... and really that was great. I cried a little too. but it was good and much needed. As confusing as life is... it's also so very beautiful. And even though life may not always be the easiest option... it is the best one. I have a passion [or atleast I hope I do] for life. And I love living and sharing it with someother people. Now all I need is someone to share it with.
Now there are a few things I have decided we need to do in life.
FIRST. Find our own rythm. We all have something in us that tells us the beat of our lives, and it directs us, tells us where to go so we can be in the right places at the right times. Call it what you like.. but I call it the spirit. And that can be the key to a successful life and being influenceal on others.
SECOND. Learn that you are never alone. Ever. no matter what. Odds are there is going to be someone who has gone through or is going through whatever you are. and so with this epifany. Even though you may be asked to stand alone... it's all for the betterment of you and what you stand for. people respect you for it. and that is a fact I am truly grateful for.
THRID. Treat everyone with love and kindness as you pass. You may not know, they could be having the worst day of their lives and have plans to go home and kill themselves that night, but then they don't because someone like you or me reaches out with a smile or a simple, hello. Believe me, simple things can change lives, I have exprienced this first hand. And it's truly amazing... Also please don't go around assuming people who have a not broken and divorced "typical american" family are not as broken and as hurting as you are on the inside. Sometimes becuse they have the family "Mom, Dad, Brother, Sister" under one roof they have someof the BIGGEST problems. But yet they cover it up, very, very, very, well... and they would gladly trade problems with you like...what, are you too popular? guys try to take advantatge of you? you don't have enough money? Gladly they would want to trade problems with you. Because just like me... the always happy one.. I have problems.. I will admit it. and they hurt alot. they have caused me more pain than you would want to know. so just be nice. enough said.
and last. be a listener. it helps so much. and mabye you can give good advice too. bbut thats up to you and how inspired you are feeling... hopefully its such.
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